Why You’re Stuck—and How to Break Free Fast!

Today, we're talking about a little known, but powerful shift in mindset that can help you navigate divorce and the rest of life's challenges with strength and resilience. It's comes down to a choice we make every day. Ask yourself, “Am I an owner of my life or a victim of my life?” One of the most impactful questions I ask my clients is not what do you need to do? But rather who do you need to be?

This isn't about adding more tasks to your To-Do list. It's about choosing a mindset that supports you no matter what life throws your way. Let's start with what it means to be an owner. An owner knows that life is a gift. An owner practices gratitude. An owner practices giving. Asking questions like what can I learn from this?

Or where is the hidden opportunity here? They see challenges as moments to learn, grow and create. Life feels rich, full of potential, and every day holds the chance to create something meaningful.

When you speak as an owner, you say things like, “I want to.” “I choose to.” “I can, I will.” These phrases show that you're taking charge of your energy. Taking charge of your actions. Taking actions. Creating goals. Setting goals. Looking forward to your future.

Now let's talk about the victim mindset. Victim. See? Life is a burden. Something to get through. They often feel that life is unfair. The problems just keep coming their way. They use words like I should. They carry heavy, discouraging energy. I should start exercising.

I should change my career. I should be nicer to my children. It feels like a never-ending list of expectations that aren't even yours. But here's the truth. If there's a problem in your life, you are the problem. And I know that doesn't sound great to hear, but it is good news. If you are the problem in your life, you are also the solution in your life.

Ownership means taking full responsibility for your life, your energy, your happiness, your problems, your relationships, your work, your family. Viktor Frankl once said, everything can be taken from a man but one thing. The last of the human freedoms to choose one's attitude in any given set of circumstances. Your attitude is something that no one can ever take away from you, and you can choose it.

Each moment, each day. Learning to be realistic and optimistic, even in challenging times, is a skill. It starts with gratitude. Seeing the good in what you have, giving to others, and challenging those negative thoughts and those negative beliefs that creep in. So here's your action step. Practice being an owner in your life. Take time to be alone with your thoughts.

Reflect on how far you've come and celebrate that progress. Laugh a lot. Have fun. And most importantly, be compassionate with yourself along the way. Take actions to move forward. Hold yourself accountable. Be an owner in your life. Let's choose ownership. Positivity and gratitude. Remember, the power to shape your life is in your hands.

You are not broken. And there's nothing to fix.

And you are loved.

xo